Dear Delores,

I have dated my share of losers that I've met in the bar, through friends, etc. and I felt that it was time I venture into the world of online dating. I met a couple nice guys and a couple freaks, but it's ok because they are the ones that leave me with interesting stories to share:

Gomer 1:
I met a guy who seemed nice and owned a restaurant in Vancouver (lived there too). We were chatting online and he asked if I ever come to Van to visit. I said yes and he said maybe when I come next, we can get together. I said maybe. Then we chatted more about school/work/life/etc. and he asked if I was happy living in Victoria. I said yes since I had a good job and was in school. He asked what I'd think about moving to Van to be with him (note: we had only been talking for about 30 mins...) I politely said that I didn't think so. He tried to convince me by saying things like we could get married, go on expensive trips, I could buy as many clothes as I wanted.. I was kinda freaked out by this point, so I said no thanks, that I'd rather stay here in Victoria. THEN he offered to move to Victoria and buy a house for us to share here! Less than an hour of talking to a guy off the internet and I had received an offer to become his trophy wife. Yikes. Freak.

Gomer 2:
After the guy mentioned above, I thought that I would switch internet dating sites. I skimmed through another of the popular sites and found lots of really cute guys.. especially a biology student that had a picture of himself shirtless (I know, I know.. but he was SOO cute). He had everything that I wanted at that time (I just wanted fun).. he was going to school, had a job, he was cute, tattooed, pierced.. but his interests were "partying and beer". Whatever. I thought that he was cute and that he might be fun to go out partying with and see what happened.. Anyway, we exchanged email addresses, then later phone numbers. We talked for awhile on MSN and almost instantly he started talking about sex. I'm open-minded, but I thought it was a little soon. He proceeded to tell me how "big" he was and even sent me a picture of it (note: the picture was his "member" with a girl going down on him. yuck!)! Then he asked if he could send one of his friends over to have sex with me. Apparently it turned him on thinking of " a girl he really liked" with one of his friends. He tried so hard to convince me to do it but I kept turning him down. By this time I knew he was a freak, but for some reason I was still curious. We scheduled a date and he didn't call. Then we rescheduled and again I got stood up. Loser.

The funny thing was that I received an email from him a month later saying that he missed me and wanted to get together. I deleted it without responding.